How does a private banker or advisor refer a family to a coach?

An advisor refers a family to a coach best by doing three things in order: raising the idea as an option rather than a verdict, letting the family decide whether to pursue it, and making the first contact in a way that protects the client’s confidentiality. Often that means describing the coach to the family and letting them reach out, or making an introduction with only the details the family has agreed to share.

Private bankers, family office advisors, lawyers and accountants often hear the succession worry before anyone else does. The founder mentions it in the middle of a conversation about something else. The advisor then has a choice: let it pass, or help the family do something about it. This article is about doing the second well.

When is it the right moment to raise coaching?

Coaching is one option among several, and it fits some situations better than others. It tends to be relevant when:

The successor has decided to take the role, and the question is no longer whether but how well.
The gap is authority, not knowledge. The successor knows the business, but the board, the senior team or key partners still look to the parent.
There are real events ahead: a first board meeting as chair or CEO, a company address, a family meeting about the handover.
The founder has said something concrete, such as “they freeze in front of the board” or “my team respects me, I am not sure they will follow them.”

If the successor is undecided, or the gap is experience rather than authority, other routes usually come first. What advisors should recommend when the successor is not ready sets out those options, from a longer timeline to an interim leader.

How do you raise it with the family?

The founder trusts you, and that trust is the reason the suggestion will be heard. It is also the reason to handle it carefully.

Ask before suggesting. “What would you need to see to feel confident about the handover?” invites the founder to describe the gap in their own words.
Offer it as one option. “Some families in this position use a coach who works one to one with the successor. Would it be useful if I told you more?” leaves the decision with them.
Talk about situations, not character. “Board meetings where the questions go to you rather than to them” is easier to hear than any judgement about the person.
Suggest the successor is involved early. Development imposed on a successor rarely works. The founder may want to raise it with them before any contact is made. Introducing a coach to your son or daughter is written for parents in exactly that position, and can be passed on.
Stay in your lane. Say plainly what a coach can and cannot do, and that coaching does not replace legal, tax or governance advice.

How do you protect client confidentiality?

Discretion is the advisor’s first duty, and it should shape every step of a referral.

Do not share client details without permission. Before naming a family, the business or the situation to any third party, ask the client what they are comfortable sharing. Your own firm’s policies on client information and third-party introductions apply; check them.
Prefer the family making the first contact. Giving the founder a name and a website, and letting them reach out, keeps control with them.
If you make the introduction, keep it minimal. A role, an industry and a rough timeline are often enough for a first conversation. The rest can come later, directly from the family.
Ask the coach about confidentiality before you refer. How do they treat information from the family, from the successor and from colleagues they interview? What do they publish? A clear answer is a good sign. Is successor coaching confidential? covers the questions worth asking.
Respect the family’s decision either way. If they decline, the subject is closed unless they reopen it.

How do you check a coach before mentioning them?

Your name goes with the recommendation, so it is worth some care.

Ask what exactly happens. How long, how often, one to one or group, what happens before the first session and between sessions.
Ask how the parent is involved. What the parent hears, and what stays private.
Ask what is not included. A coach who claims to cover investment, tax, legal or governance work is stepping into territory that belongs elsewhere.
Ask about price and terms in plain language. You should be able to tell the family what the engagement costs and who pays.
Notice how they sell. Hype, guarantees of outcomes or pressure to decide quickly are reasons for caution.
Consider a conversation yourself first. Many advisors prefer to understand an approach directly before mentioning it to a client.

What does Second Chair™’s request form accept?

Second Chair™ is approached through a short request form on the site, and advisors can use it directly. The form asks:

Name and email. These are the only two required fields.
You are. The options are the current leader or owner, the successor, a family office or private banker, or an advisor to the family.
The business and its industry. Optional.
When the transition begins. Within six months, in six to eighteen months, in two to three years, or already underway.
What concerns you most. A free-text field, also optional.

Before naming the family in any request, agree it with the family. If they prefer to make contact themselves, the advisor’s part can end with the introduction. The form states that requests are held in confidence and never shared.

Every request is read personally. Where there is a fit, Nikola replies within three business days with a personal email, not an automated one, and only then sends a link to arrange a private conversation. There is no public booking calendar.

What the form does not do is worth saying too. It is not the start of an engagement. It opens a conversation. Any engagement itself begins under a mutual NDA, and Second Chair™ does not publish case studies or name the families it works with.

What should the family know before the first conversation?

An advisor can save everyone time by telling the family a few things up front.

Who it is for. One successor, roughly 25 to 45, who has decided to take the role and will step into leadership or a board seat within one to three years.
What it is. Six months: a private diagnostic, 24 weekly one-to-one sessions built around the successor’s real events, monthly briefings for the parent, and a facilitated handover session ending in a signed Handover Charter.
What it is not. No investment, tax or legal advice, and no help deciding whether the successor should take the role.
What it costs. Engagements begin at $50,000, paid in full by the family or the company. There is no guarantee and no refunds.
Who does the work. Nikola Jovanović takes on every engagement himself.

If the family’s need is wealth, governance or structure, your own team and their other advisors remain the right people. What a bank’s next-generation program covers is a useful reference for where group programs fit alongside one-to-one work.

In short

Raise coaching as an option, after asking what the founder needs to see, and let the family decide.
Protect confidentiality at every step: ask permission before sharing details, prefer the family making first contact, and check your firm’s policies.
Check any coach first: method, parent involvement, scope, price and how they handle confidential information.
Second Chair™’s request form has an option for a family office or private banker and one for an advisor to the family; only name and email are required.

Advisors who want to understand the approach before mentioning it can request a private conversation.